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Jesse
I sat across from the Alphas of the Fangstorm Brotherhood. They had requested I meet with them and I decided to get it finished. We all stared at one another for a while, the silence stretching on.
The Fangstorms were an odd pack. They heeded the old traditions like they were gospel. For them, it was of the utmost importance to stick to these traditions. But, if someone in the pack didn’t want to then they simply let them choose that path.
If their path led them away from the pack then so be it. There would be no shunning or hatred towards them. It was simply how the ancestors wished it to me.
“Jesse, you know why we have brought you here, correct?”
I nodded. “You wish to know what pack we will be aligning ourselves with.”
“Precisely,” one of the elders told me “Have you made your decision yet or are the five of you still considering your options?”
“We are still considering our options and to be honest, I don’t care what pack we end up with,” I said truthfully,”
am completely neutral on the subject.”
The elders all nodded together thoughtfully. “We respect that answer, Jesse, and look forward to hearing the decision no matter what you choose.”
When I got back to the house, Matt was pacing in the living room. My eyebrows shot up.
“What’s with you?”
“Nothing,” Matt snapped.
1 blinked. “Okay.”
Matt sighed. “Jesse, are you seriously not going to ask what’s wrong?”
“Matt, I don’t play that game. If something is wrong with you then you need to tell me straight out or I’m just going to ignore you and go about my day.”
He groaned. “I’m having a tough time with my pack. They are assholes who demand that I follow tradition.” “I don’t have that problem.”
It wasn’t as if I was trying to brag, but I was being matter of fact. He glared at me. I just stared back at him until the glare finally faded. This was the best way to get someone to stop glaring at you, in my opinion.
“Yes, well we can’t all be members of a pack that respects that some people balk against tradition.
Thummed. “Perhaps we should all go to your pack elders and alpha to speak with them. They will see we are a united front and hopefully back down”
Jesse, do you honestly believe that?”
“No, but it is worth it, is it not?” I asked truthfully.
The worst that could happen was they could chase us out. But I don’t know if Matt is ready to confront them yet. His pack had always been difficult. They wanted to control bis every move, dictating his life from birth to adulthood. I knew their pack dynamics were toxic and over the years, the pack had shrunk considerably over the
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years. It was no wonder they were losing people because of how strict they were.
The younger generation of wolves were living at rapid rates the pack had never seen before. I couldn’t blame Matt for being frustrated. My friend and I always assumed that he was going to leave. It just wasn’t up for debate. Why would he want to stay?
None of us were going to consider joining; that much was for sure. I certainly wasn’t going to let Lia join–not that I would ever order her around.
“It’ll be over soon,” I assured Matt. “You’ll be leaving that pack and will find a new one.”
Matt huffed. “The problem with that is I am not sure if they will let me go without a huge fight.”
“They need to be snuffed out.”
The words tumbled from my mouth before I could control myself. Matt gaped at me but then he burst out laughing.
“Jesse, there are times when your bluntness scares the shit out of me but at times like this it makes me laugh.”
“I do my best to achieve both outcomes, but it’s difficult to achieve both at the same time,” I lamented, a small smile making its way across my lips.
Matt stepped back. “Jesse, you know what happens when you smile. It creeps everyone out.”
“Is it creeping you out right now, Matt?”
“Yes,” I answered without so much as any hesitation.
Later that night, I found myself needing a glass of water. I headed downstairs and was surprised to bump into Lla. She looked at me, smiling nervously.
But her smile didn’t look as nervous as it usually did. Over the weeks we had been living together, the more comfortable she became with me.
I knew that most people were uncomfortable with me. It was simply a fact I had come to accept at an early age. People would say I was too intense or quiet. Quiet people could snap in a moment’s notice and you wouldn’t even know it because they were so quiet.
Lia was drinking some tea, one of her preferred drinks. I had no preference for tea or coffee. Whatever was available would be good enough for me.
“You know,” Lia whispered, “I used to be scared of you.”
“Scared?” I asked, glancing at her.
“Yeah,” she said, shrugging. “You’re quiet. The strong, silent type. And that stare of yours? Intense. Felt like you were sizing me up every time you looked at me.”
“Wasn’t sizing you up,” I said. “Just… watching.”
“Exactly!” she said, leaning forward. “The watching. It was like you could see through me, Like you were analyzing every move I made.”
“Didn’t mean to.”
“I figured,” she said. “But it was unnerving. Especially when we were younger. I didn’t know what to do with someone who didn’t talk much. Everyone else around me just–talks.”
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I smirked faintly. “Not my style.”
‘Clearly,” she said, rolling her eyes. “But back then, I thought it meant something bad. Like you were judging me or–waiting for me to mess up or something.”
“Never thought that.”
“I know that now,” she said quickly. “It’s just… you’ve got this way of being in the room without saying a word, but it’s like your presence fills it anyway.”
I shrugged. “Not trying to ”
“I know,” she said, then paused. “I think I kind of like it now.”
“Like what?”
“That you don’t fill the space with words,” she said. “It’s.. different. Most people can’t stand silence. They just ramble. But you? You let the quiet sit. It’s.. nice.”
“Nice?”
“Yeah,” she said, nodding. “It makes me feel like I don’t have to try so hard. Like I can just… be.”
“That’s good,” I said.
“It is,” she agreed. “And honestly, I feel less… I don’t know I am intimidated by you. I mean, I still think you’re intense, but it’s not scary anymore. It’s kind of comforting
“Comforting?”
“Yeah, like… you’re steady,” she said, glancing at me. “You don’t flinch, you don’t panic. You’re just… there. Solid. I get it now.”
I nodded slowly. “Took you a while.”
She laughed. “Yeah, well, I wasn’t exactly a fan of being stared at, Jesse.”
“Not staring,” I said.
“You were,” she said, smirking. “But it’s fine. I know you were just… watching. Taking things in. That’s who your
dre”
“Pretty much.”
“See? Even now, you’re doing it,” she teased.
I raised an eyebrow. “Doing what?”
“Being all… you,” she said, gesturing vaguely. “Quiet. Intense. Like you’re waiting for me to say something profound.”
“Not waiting for profound,” I said. “Just listening.”
“Listening,” she repeated, nodding. “That’s another thing You listen. Most people don’t. They just wait for their turn to talk. But you? You hear everything.”
“Only when it’s worth hearing,” I said, and she laughed again.
“Okay, see? That’s what I mean. You barely say anything, but when you do, it’s–what’s the word–weighty.” “Weighty?”
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“Yeah,” she said, grinning “Like, it sticks. Makes people think.”
I smirked. “Maybe that’s the point.”
“Maybe,” she said, tilting her head. “But either way, I’m glad I’m not scared of you anymore. You’re… not so bad, Jesse.”
“Thanks,” I said dryly.
“Don’t let it go to your head,” she teased.
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
She smiled, leaning back onto the couch. “You’re all right, Jesse.‘
I just nodded, letting the silence settle between us again.
It was a polite conversation. I did want to touch her, to put my mark on her but the time would come when I’d be able to do this. It was just going to take tim
Lia was adjusting to all of this, but she was adjusting faster than we ever thought she would.
The two of us stood there for a while before Lia told me that she needed to go back to bed. I nodded towards her, giving her a small smirk. It was better for me to smile rather than smile because as I’ve said before, my smile did tend to upset people.
A few times I stared in the mirror, trying to figure out if it was truly as scary as people thought it was. The result was no, it wasn’t scary. I thought it looked fine, but I suppose I couldn’t see it because I was looking for it through my lens rather than the lens of others.
24 The Ashen Howl bibe
