26
Sabrina’s POV
When I arrived home, the silence enveloped me as soon as opened the door. The darkness of the room felt more depressing than usual as if the house was feeling my emotional exhaustion. I turned on the lights, hung my bag near the door, then took off my shoes in slow motion.
Every corner of the room was so familiar, yet it felt empty. I walked towards the sofa and let myself fall on it, my tired body leaning back while my thoughts drifted back to Charlie. His image kept ringing, his innocent smile when I gave him the robot earlier, his cheerful laughter when we played, and his satisfied face after eating ice cream. It was all like a beautiful dream that ended too quickly.
In that silence, the ticking sound of the wall clock seemed to be a reminder of the time that continued to pass, while I was trapped in memories. Charlie was the light in my life, a light that seemed like it would never go out. But now, all that was left was a shadow, and every second that passed added to the unbearable sense of loss.
I closed my eyes, trying to chase away the dark shadows that filled my mind. However, every time I opened my eyes, the longing hit me again. Memories of our laughter and jokes are like soft music that fills this empty space, but every note also reminds me of the sadness that accompanies that happiness.
The night is getting late, and the lights that are on are unable to dispel the darkness that covers my heart. My cell phone vibrates beside me, breaking my reverie. A message from an old friend asking how I am. Lazily, I take my cell phone and reply to the message, hoping that a little interaction can lighten the burden on my mind. However, every word I write feels bland, unable to describe what I really feel.
After sending the message, I look at Charlie’s photos in the gallery. Each picture is a piece of a precious moment that is captured, but also like a knife that tears the warmth of my heart. In one photo, Charlie smiles widely with ice cream melting in his hand. His smile is the perfect combination of happiness and innocence, something that I can only remember now.
The noise outside begins to disappear and makes me sink deeper into this silence. I know I have to get up and continue my life, but how can I forget the figure who has given a different color to my life? It felt like every step I took in this world was heavy and painful as if my steps were held back by memories that continued to haunt me.
I took a deep breath, trying to calm my turbulent heart. Every beat of my heart seemed to remind me of memories with him–smiles, laughter, even moments full of emotion. He was like a light in the dark, and now, without him, everything felt empty.
I knew that time was ticking, even though I was stuck in the same place. In this silence, I tried to find a way to get up. Shouldn’t life go on? This problem seemed to be transformed into two paths: to remain trapped in sadness or to move forward, even though it was full of doubt.
As my gaze swept across the room, my eyes fell on an open book on the table. It was a book we often read together. Unconsciously, I smiled a little, remembering the moments when we debated the meaning of each sentence. Maybe, if I could take a little of that happiness, I could continue my steps.
With all my courage, I got up from my place. Slowly, I reached for the book, letting each page take me into beautiful memories. And even though my heart is still heavy, I know that I have to move forward. Not only for me but also for her–so that all these memories are not in vain
Every step I take will hold those beautiful memories, giving new colors to my life. The days ahead may not be the same, but I promise, I will try to live this life to the fullest. For us.
I take a deep breath and close my eyes. The warmth of that moment felt so real, but now it’s just a painful. memory. I know I should be happy to have spent time with her, but my longing doesn’t subside. Instead, it grows stronger, like an unstoppable tide.
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wish I could hug her again now, hear her voice calling me ovingly. “Mom.. murmur softly, my voice barely audible in this quiet room.
As I stand up to go to my room, my body feels heavy, and floating, but I ignore them. After changing into tny pajama me the peace I’m looking for.
head starts to throb. My thoughts feel like they’re
I lle down on the bed. However, sleep doesn’t give
That night, I kept on being restless. My sleep was restless, full of strange dreams that made my chest feel tight. I dreamed of Charlie crying, calling me, but I couldn’t reach im. Hazel was there, pulling him away from me, and I could only stand helplessly.
I woke up many times; my breath was gasping, and my body began to heat up. I tried to sit up, but my head was spinning, and cold sweat was running down my temples. I touched my forehead with the back of his hand, which was incredibly hot. But I didn’t have the energy to get up and look for medicine.
My hand reached for Charlie’s small photo on the bedside table. His small face smiled behind the frame, making my tears flow without being able to stop. “I miss you, Charlie,” I whispered in a trembling voice.
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