I shake my head Chapter 10

I shake my head Chapter 10
  1. The bond 

Lia 

The next day or so had the guys moving into the extra rooms we had. There were two so Colby and Rain paired up while Jesse and Matt shared the other. I tried to make myself scarce but with it being a Friday, I had no choice but to accept that this was my life now

At least at school, I could pretend

But I focused on the fact that my brother would be there

Or so I thought

What do you mean you’re not going to be here this weekend?!” 

I’m visiting my mate. We haven’t seen each other in a while because she has been busy with exams and I’ve been busy with rugby.” 

That means I’ll be alone with them.” 

Them?Michael asked with a laugh. You mean your males.” 

Lshivered. Stop saying that. I don’t like to hear those words, you know that.” 

Denial is not a good thing, Lia.” 

Denial is the only thing getting me through this!” 

No matter what I said, my brother refused to listen to me. He told me that I was going to be fine and the weekend would be a good bonding experience for me along with my hates

When I came down to eat, I realized the four had prepared dinner. Yes, they had prepared dinner and set the table. It smells good,I forced myself to say

It wasn’t like it didn’t smell good but I didn’t want to give compliments. I wanted to resist this bonding experience with every fiber of my being 

I made it,Rain said proudly, preening under my compliment. Jesse helped. Colby set the table and Matt just kept brooding.” 

Matt grumbled something under his breath I couldn’t understand

Before I could decide whether to stay or go, my stomach growled. It decided for me, spurring me to sit down and dig in

The food was delicious. Rain and Jesse had outdone themselves. But, as great as the food was, the conversation was sparse. This tension was so great you could cut it with a knife. Throw in a pinch of awkwardness and it made for an experience I wanted to forget

Let me wash the dishes,1 offered

Rain grinned. Since Jesse and I cooked, Matt should be the one to do the dishes.” 

What about Colby?Matt growled

He set the table and you brooded.” 

I can help,I repeated

10 The bond 

+25 BONUS 

Matt grumbled. No, I have it.” 

Without a word, he gathered all the dirty dishes. The other three stood around, watching me until I sighed

Go do what you have to do. Wecan meet up in the living room in an hour.” 

This was all it took for them to stop standing and staring at me, much to my relief

I was going to go upstairs and have a rest but I saw that Matt had forgotten a couple of dishes in his haste to get away from her. Sighing, I gathered them all up. Matt tensed, likely smelling me before he heard or saw me

You forgot a few dishes.” 

Matt whirled around. Oh, thanks.” 

He grabbed them out of my hands so fast that one of them fell off the pile. It fell to the flo Thankfully, it didn’t shatter. 

causing me to gasp

The two of us crouched down, reaching for the plate at the same time. Our hands brushed against each other, my body reacting almost instantly. My cheeks became flushed, ips parting to suck in a large gulp of air. Matt was staring at me, pupils blown wide and lips pulling back into a possessive snarl

If he came a bit closer I could feel his body heat radiating off him. I- 

Guys, what fell?Rain called out

The two of us sprung apart. Matt grabbed the plate and walked back towards the sink

I got it. Just godo whatever.” 

We’re meeting in the living room later,I whispered

Matt stiffened. Yeah, I’ll be there.” 

I reached out, hand hovering mere inches from his bare, muscular arms. Two parts of me were wrestling, trying to pull me in two different directions. A part of me wanted to reach out to him, and comfort Matt. He was still hurting, but Matt turned around, causing me to wrench my hand backward

Staying was not an option. I ran up the stairs and back to my room which was becoming the place I spent most of my time lately. When I came down the next morning, I nearly ran into Colby. He smiled at me

Morning, Lia.” 

Morning” 

He leaned down, brushing his lips across my forehead. I flushed bright red, resembling a tomato. Colby just chuckled

You blush so easily. How did I never notice?” 

Well, I think it has something to do with you bullying me for years on end.” 

And that was shitty of me. It sucks that took this event for me to realize that was wrong, but it is what it is and I’ll do my best to prove to you I can be a worthy mate.” 

Rain popped up beside Colby, making me jump, Where Colby was then Rain was usually close by. The two of them were very close to one another, having been friends since they were in literal diapers

Colby is right. All of us are going to prove to you we can be a worthy mate.” 

  1. The bondi 

+25 BONUS 

Except Matt,Colby muttered to Rain, but he didn’t say it soft enough that I couldn’t make out what he was saying 

Shut up, What if he hears?” 

I sighed softly. He’s glaring at you from the doorway that’s cracked open.” 

Those two were trying to apologize to Matt, giving me a chance to squeeze past him. It seemed fitting that Jesse was downstairs. He cupped my cheek, rubbing a calloused finger across my cheekbone, leaving warmth in its wake

How did you sleep?he asked, voice low

Fine.” 

He growled. That’s a lie. You know, you can be honest with me and tell me if your not feeling well. I want to know how my future mate is feeling.” 

It’s been an adjustment,I added

As it would be, but I’ll help you adjust. Trust in that.” 

Breakfast was as awkward an affair as dinner had been. Well, maybe not as much. It was a bit better than yesterday

Did this mean I was adjusting

The thought filled me with dread and some happiness. It was the happiness that scared me the most

It was good that Simone was only a phone call away because I needed to talk to her

Simone, I don’t even know where to start. This whole situation isa lot.” 

what happened? You sounded so stressed in your last message ” 

It’s them. Colby, Matt, Jesse, and Rain. Having them here every day, all the timeit’s messing with my head.” 

Okay, but aren’t they supposed to be bonding with you? Like, that’s the whole point, right?” 

Yeah, but it’s not that simple. They’re trying. I can see that. They’re being kind, thoughtful even. But I can’t forget what they used to be like.” 

The bullying 

Exactly. They made my life hell. And noweverything is different

That’s a lot to process. Do you think they’ve changed?” 

That’s what I can’t figure out. They seem genuine, but then a part of me is waiting for the other shoe to drop like it’s some elaborate act.” 

Could it be that they regret how they treated you?” 

Maybe. They’ve apologizedeach of them, in their waybut it’s hard to justlet go of all that pain, you know?Fair. And that scares you.” 

Yeah. Because I don’t want to feel that way. Not about them.” 

Maybe you’re scared because it’s easier to hold on to the anger than to risk trusting them.” 

+25 BONUS 

10 The bond 

Probably. But if I let go, if I start to care about them, what happens if they hurt me again?” 

You’ve got to ask yourself if they’re worth the risk. Have they done enough to earn a second chance?” 

I don’t know. Sometimes it feels like they have, and other times, I just hear the echoes of how they used to laugh 

at me

It’s okay to feel conflicted. This isn’t something you can figure out overnight.” 

No kidding. I just wish I knew what’s real and what’sresidual from the bond.” 

Then maybe take it slow. Let them prove themselves. And remember, it’s okay to protect yourself, too.” 

Yeah. I just hope I can figure it out before it all gets even more complicated.” 

The two of us spoke a bit more when I heard one of Simone’s mates on the other end. I could smell one of mine nearby. It was Matt who was outside my room trying to decide whether or not he wanted to come in

A part of me wanted him to come in so the two of us could just talk everything out all at once. Neither of us was going to survive living together at this rate 

11 Team Mission La 

+25 BONUS 

  1. Team Mission Lia 

Matt 

My phone started going off way too early. Growling I grabbed it and opened the group chat

Group Chat: Team Mission Lia” 

6:03 AM 

Jesse: You, everyone up? We need to talk

Matt: Why is this happening before the sun is fully awake 

Colby: Because it’s important, Matt. Now get over it and focus

Rain: zzzz

Jesse: Rain, wake up. This isn’t optional. 

Rain: Halfconscious. Proceed

Matt: This better not be about Lia. It’s too early for emotional trauma

Jesse: It is about Lia. We can’t ignore this anymore

Colby: We’ve been a mess around her, and it’s time we get our act together. No more lurking awkwardly or being avoidant

Rain: Do you mean no more accidentallybumping into her to check if she’s still mad

Jesse: EXACTLY. We’ve been idiots. Years of bullying her didn’t help

Matt: Didn’t it help? It made her hate us. Deservedly 

Colby: Which is why we need a plan. She’s smart. If we just push her with apologies, she’ll think we’re trying to manipulate her

Rain: We kind of were bullies, though. Why wouldn’t she assume that

Matt: Rain’s right. Trust doesn’t happen overnight

Jesse: Then we earn it. The step one is acknowledging we’ve hurt her. No excuses, no we were just kids” 

garbage

Colby: We also need to make it clear we’re serious about this. It’s not just about us liking herit’s about showing her we’re safe now

Rain: Safeis

We’re still chaotic

Matt: Speak for yourself. I’m perfectly stable

Rain: Says the guy who yelled at a squirrel for stealing his sandwich

Matt: Irrelevant. Stay on topic

Jesse: Focus, people. We’re meeting early this morning to hash out the specifics

Matt: I want to sleep

Colby: Your sleep is canceled. This takes priority

+25 BONUS 

11 Team Mission Ula 

Rain: What even is the plan? Just grovel

Jesse: We apologize first. Then we start showing her through actionsnot just words that she can rely on us. We’ve got to be consistent

Colby: Small gestures. Respect her space. Prove we’re different

Matt: So, no grand romantic declarations? No comering her with we’re your fated matesspeeches

nzing Not. S Rain: Not. She’d run for the hills

Jesse: Exactly. We move slowly. Let her take the lead when she’s ready

Matt: Fine. But if this goes wrong, I’m blaming Jesse

Colby: Blame yourself for being a pain all these years

Rain: Group consensus: Jesse’s fault if it fails

Jesse: Whatever. Just be up in about an hour. No excuses

Rain: Cool. Going back to sleep now

Matt: Same. Don’t wake me up again unless it’s life or death. I need that extra hour

Colby: Or Lia

Matt:Fine

Jesse: Good. Let’s fix this mess

Even though I got an extra hour, it didn’t do much. I dragged myself downstairs, grateful that Lia was still fast asleep in her room

Why are we up this early?Rain asked, barely stifling a yawn 

He scratched his neck where some stubble was already starting to form. Rain shaved when he remembered. It could happen every day or the guy could go a full two weeks before starting to complain that the new beard he was sporting was itchy beyond all reason

Because Jesse and Colby thought it was best we get up at the ass crack of dawn to discuss what we are going to do from here on our own,I snapped

I’d rather be in our room, catching a few more hours of sleep before starting the day. On weekends I liked to get some Rugby practice in. Not like my skills were going to get soft in a day or two without practice, but I liked running across the field, feeling the wind through my braids

It helped center me and keep my mind at ease. With all the stress I’d been under since finding out my future mate was Lia Brown of all people, I started to throw myself into practice. This was the only time I was able to feel at ease. Other times I just became stressed out, letting my mind wander and wonder about what all of this was going 

to mean for me 

I didn’t care about sharing someone with three of my best friends. If anything, it helped me feel more at ease. Why did it have to be her of all people? It could’ve been anyone else. Hell, I would’ve been able to deal with it being her loud and a little bit crazy best friend Simone. But Lia

The guilt I’d always shoved aside bubbling to the surface in full force now. Whenever I looked at Lia all I thought about was everything I had done to her. A simple apology wasn’t going to help. She would continue to feel this bitterness whenever she looked at us, not that I blamed her 

11 Team Mesion Lia 

#25 BONUS 

How were the other guys able to push past this so easily whereas I was the one who kept dwelling on it, unable to move on? Rain was using his humor to deal while Jesse came off as someone who was never bothered with anything, Colby was thinking critically about it while I was in denial

Well, I wasn’t in denial anymore. I was in denial for a long me but now I accepted that the two of us were mates. The part I was having trouble with was accepting a way to move forward and make it all work for us

So, Colby and I were talking before the two of you came out here,Jesse started to say. Both of us seem to think that a wonderful way to go about it is for us to spend some quality time together with Lia. We’ll do a group thing after because she might be intimidated by all of us spending time together with her at once.” 

Colby nodded. Yeah, oneonone outings will be the best way to go first.” 

Who’s going first?I asked cautiously

Colby and Jesse turned right towards me, a rare smile breaking onto Jesse’s face

 

 

I shake my head

I shake my head

Status: Ongoing

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